The Knicks continue their futile attempt to make the second round of the NBA playoffs today with Game 4 of their first round series against the Cleveland Cavaliers. The Knicks won Game 3 using the clever strategy of having Elfrid Payton wear Darius Garland’s jersey and shoot a bunch of shots (similar to how the Minnesota Timberwolves let Mark Madsen shoot a bunch of threes that time they were trying to tank their way into keeping their first round pick).
The Knicks, though, are smart. They don’t like to just lose, they want to lose in the most painful way possible, so they cleverly came up with the idea of taking a 2-1 lead in this series to give their fans hope, so that when the Knicks inevitably lose this series, it will hurt even more. Because make no mistake about it, the Knicks are going to find a way to lose this game.
It starts with Quentin Grimes missing Game 4, and it will end, I presume, with Jalen Brunson’s leg exploding and his leg bone stabbing Immanuel Quickley in the ACL. Or perhaps Mitch’s shoelaces will somehow get entangled in every other players’ sneakers, causing one gigantic collective sprained ankle. I don’t know HOW it will happen, just that it WILL happen.
But hey, if you get off on watching the Knicks lose, then this game will be for you.
Let’s go, Knicks, not that it matters, since they are doomed.