Statistical Analysis. Humor. Knicks.

Saturday, September 21, 2019

Content Tagged "Knicks"

Detroit Pistons 115 – New York Knicks 89 – Game (?) Recap

Minutes before this game was on, Al Trautwig was at center court telling the viewers that coach Fizdale told his guys to treat the last seven games of the season as a playoff series, and that since we were 3-3 in the last six the game against Detroit would have counted as a game seven. Now, aside from the total retconning bullshit of that claim (yeah, sure. The last seven. What if we went 5-1 during that stretch? Or 0-6? It’s things like this that trigger my inner con artist alarm, but whatever), I think now we know what would …continue reading

New York Knicks 96 – Chicago Bulls 86 – Game Recap

It’s cool being the worst team in the NBA for the season but knowing that your opponent is going to be the worst team in the NBA on the nights it’s facing you. Our active roster looks like this: two 9th overall picks, an 18th pick, a 23rd pick, two second round picks and three undrafted dudes. There’s no way someone is going to do worse, right? Well, I present to you the April 2019 Chicago Bulls: a hodge-podge of fringe guys around a legitimate NBA player (Robin Lopez) and nothing else. They never presented a challenge to our own merry …continue reading

Washington Wizards 110 – New York Knicks 113 – Game Recap

“What can change the nature of a game?” Some of you might have recognized the origin of the broad strokes of this question. You know I’m a gamer, and in 1999 (already 20 years ago! Damn I feel really old) a revolutionary RPG came out for PC thanks to Interplay, trying to exploit the success of Baldur’s Gate in 1998. The name of the game was Planescape: Torment, and while it was kind of a commercial blunder at first (becoming profitable in subsequent years thanks to its cult following and an Enhanced Edition that came out in 2017 at the …continue reading

New York Knicks 96 – Houston Rockets 120 – Game Recap

I won’t toy around even a tiny bit: this game was pure ass. The final score doesn’t even begin to tell how mismatched were the two teams, with the worldbeating Rockets straight up abusing the Knicks from the start, and without needing too much from the reigning MVP to complete that feat (because let’s face it, in 2019 a 26 point game from Harden – on 21 shots! – is kinda subpar) or elite efficiency from the whole team; the Rockets shot 42.6% from the field, but connected on 22 threes on 59 attempts while our guys were just able …continue reading

New York Knicks 100 – Orlando Magic 114 – Game Recap

This early April games are seldom relevant, even during non-tanking seasons. There are only a handful of games bearing any sort of importance, what with most of the seeding and qualfication threshold being already handed out. Well, this wasn’t one of them. Orlando needs every win it can get to sneak into the playoffs (the Magic began the night being 9th, down 0.5 games from the 8th spot held by Miami), and the Knicks need every loss they can get to ensure their place amongst the top tanking teams ever. That said, the game wasn’t as bad as you could …continue reading

Chicago Bulls 105 – New York Knicks 113 – Game Recap

Well, well, well. Did anyone ever doubt we would end up winning this one? I mean, did you see beforehand the Bulls’ starting lineup? Three undrafted guys. A late first round-pick on his third team. A good center with a journeyman resume. If there ever was a blatant tank job, it was this one. Not that I blame them: it’s the right thing to do, just like it was the right thing to do to play our (mostly) young guys and be happy with any result. In short: of course we did win this one. To be honest, I’m pretty …continue reading

Toronto Raptors 117 – New York Knicks 92 – Game Recap

It occurs to me I’ve never exactly told you about my Clark Kent job. I don’t know if there’s such a profession in the USA; but my trade is essentially facility management for condos, accounting for expenses for common areas, negotiating between home owners, and generally acting as the guy you call if you’re an home owner and you’re having some sort of building-related problem. In short, I’m sort of a commissioner of condos. At the end of the year, you have to report in a public meeting with the owners about expenses, works in progress, etc. Historically, in Italy there …continue reading