Statistical Analysis. Humor. Knicks.

Sunday, February 14, 2016

2015-16 Game Thread: Knicks vs Celtics

Then put your little… hand in mine… There ain’t no hill or mountain… we can’t climb… Thus begins Bill Murray’s morning in Groundhog Day when his alarm clock goes off at the Ungodly hour of 6 AM. It being Groundhog Day it seems to fit my new morning routine because we got the bright idea to adopt a puppy. He’s cute, sure. But when they tell you training a new puppy is stressful and takes a lot of work, they are underselling it. It’s a recurring nightmare of reinforcing behaviors that begins every day at 6 AM, with minor improvements …continue reading

Knicks Morning News (2016.02.02)

[New York Times] Gay Scores 32 to Lead Kings Over Bucks, 111-104 (Tue, 02 Feb 2016 05:54:42 GMT) Rudy Gay had 32 points, nine rebounds and six assists as the Sacramento Kings snapped a five-game losing streak by defeating the Milwaukee Bucks 111-104 on Monday night. [New York Times] Nuggets End Raptors’ 11-Game Winning Streak, 112-93 (Tue, 02 Feb 2016 05:39:54 GMT) The Toronto Raptors were ready for Danilo Gallinari. They didn’t have an answer for Nikola Jokic. [New York Times] Randolph, Green Lead Grizzlies Past Pelicans, 110-95 (Tue, 02 Feb 2016 05:33:55 GMT) Zach Randolph used his size and …continue reading

Warriors Historically Great, Knicks Not

I’ve just crossed the threshold of the Warriors’ locker room, and the first thing I see is Klay Thompson pissing on an orange and blue foam finger. This, one half the Splash Brothers later claims, was ripped off the helpless hand of a sobbing five-year-old fan. Ruthless, yes, but a breed part and parcel with Golden State’s maraudic march. “Get that action!” Draymond Green eggs his teammate from a corner locker, whipping his dick around like an unknotted lasso. “More like Badison Square Garbage!” Such was the din of destruction that befell the New York Knicks Sunday night, with the …continue reading

Knicks Morning News (2016.02.01)

[New York Daily News] Curry off but Warriors dismantle Knicks behind Green, Klay (Mon, 01 Feb 2016 06:24:18 GMT) It was just another day at the office for what may be the best team in NBA history. The Knicks offered no resistance. [New York Daily News] Isola: Gash, off night can’t stop Steph Curry and Warriors (Mon, 01 Feb 2016 05:35:26 GMT) Stephen Curry was being pulled in different directions as he tried to navigate his way to the media scrum that awaited him. [New York Times] N.B.A. Roundup: Solid Bench Effort Propels Clippers to Victory Over Bulls (Mon, 01 …continue reading

Quick Recap: Knicks vs. All the Warriors

“A-a-a-are you a warrior? Killer? Slicin’ s*^% like a samurai. The Ol’ Northern Cali basketball…” Did you think the Knicks 1st quarter was real? LULZ. There’s is no Dana, only Zuul. Melo played valiantly, and I was proud to see the Knickerfellas playing their tails off until the last buzzer, including Sasha Vujacic who was like a marine in a bad war movie, shouting, “Get some!!! Get some!!!!” as 1000s of enemies descend on him. Thanasis Antetokounmpo got a little hype and the Knicks left for the night, defeated and already moving on. Whaddaya gonna do? The best moment of that …continue reading

Game Thread: Knicks vs. Warriors

My earliest basketball memories begin with the back of my comic books in the 1970s. I didn’t know much about basketball, the NBA or the ABA. I never played the game in elementary school, and I don’t remember being around it all that much. Sure, basketball was going on around me, but it wasn’t on the radar. Those comic books, though, taught me just enough about the characters of the game to start to care. If you’re old enough you may remember that Spalding used to make the official red, white, and blue ball of the ABA. They ran cartoonish …continue reading

Knicks Morning News (2016.01.31)

[New York Times] Jrue Holiday Sinks Jumper to Send Pelicans Past Nets (Sun, 31 Jan 2016 06:03:53 GMT) Holiday’s shot, a 15-footer with 1.3 seconds to play, gave New Orleans its fifth win in six games. But it was almost not the shot of the night: Joe Johnson nearly made a 41-footer at the buzzer. [New York Times] On Pro Basketball: Brett Brown and Steve Kerr: Coaches With Much in Common, Aside From Records (Sun, 31 Jan 2016 05:53:51 GMT) Brown, coach of the Philadelphia 76ers (the worst team in the league), and Kerr, coach of the Golden State Warriors …continue reading