Statistical Analysis. Humor. Knicks.

Thursday, November 27, 2014

‘Twas the Night Before Knicksmas

” ‘Twas the night before Knicksmas,

And all through MSG,

Not one fan was stirring,

Not even Spike Lee.

The players had practiced, worked, and prepared

in hopes that a victory soon would be theirs…”

 

One night, and the waiting is over. The beginning of the NBA season is upon us. The strange tale of the path the NBA took during 2011- the incredible play-offs, the victorious Mavericks, the lockout and its resolution, “basketball reasons-” is about to receive its final chapter, a preview of what’s to come in the sequel.

For Knicks fans, the wait has been much longer. It has been years- years- since we knew that the team being put on the court was meant to stay, that the players in whom we were investing ourselves were not merely trade chips in hopes of receiving a superstar, or rental players whose expiring contracts guaranteed cap space. This team is comprised of the players who, for better or worse, will define the early 2010’s in the minds of Knicks fans everywhere. Amar’e. Melo. Chandler. Each of them has flaws that have been recounted numerous times both by national prognosticators and in the message boards on this blog. But they are, for all their flaws, our team, and tomorrow we can return to watching the game and seeing the players decide things for themselves. So much time and energy has been put into analyzing what pieces should be added to the Knicks in hopes that they would become, one day soon, contenders. Personally, come tip-off, I’m going to experience a feeling of relief that finally the wait is over. Finally I can root for my team. Finally I can leap off my couch to celebrate another Amar’e dunk, another Melo jumper, and whatever crazy antics Shump-Shump and Jorts are up to. Finally I can return to mocking Boston (“Mickael Pietrus? Players who got bought out from lottery teams don’t scare me!), the referees (Hey Ref, if you had one more eye you’d be a cyclops!) and Eddy Curry. (Ok, I never stopped mocking him, but… “Miami Heat? More like Miami Eat!” So bad, yet so necessary.)

So, from me to everyone who cares about this team- Merry Knicksmas Eve. This is a moment you deserve. And maybe, just maybe, if everything goes right, the Knicks will find a W in their stockings. Happy holidays.

 

20 comments on “‘Twas the Night Before Knicksmas

  1. daJudge

    Very nice piece John. Merry Knicksmas Eve to all as well. For me, while I have the yips, there are no teams that scare me. If we come together, we can compete against any roster in this league. This I believe in my heart and mind. I have been following this team since 1967 and I would second THCJ–I am cautiously optimistic. However, because I am also a pathetically dopey fan, I cannot maintain my own objectivity which undoubtedly will morph into either unrealistic optimism or fatalistic pessimism. Can’t help it; but this year, I think we will all will enjoy the ride.

  2. danvt

    They’d practiced their foul shots. They’d lifted their weights
    While Stern, Hunter, and Derek Fisher decided their fates.
    When they finally decided the BRI split,
    The dates were set and coach D’Antoni said, “sh–
    We gotta sign some FA’s and teach our schemes
    To get Carmelo last year we gutted our team
    We gotta play defense and learn to compete
    If we’re to have any chance against the C’s and the Heat
    But just as it seemed we’d allow dunks like a sieve
    Along came a GM who taught us to believe
    A quiet type of hero who behind the scenes had been
    An unlikely savior, Grunwald, Glen.
    He said, listen Guitar Jimmy it’s a foolhardy chase
    We won’t get Chris Paul it’s a total waste
    If you don’t mind, sir, I’ll say it with candor
    I think I can land us Tyson Chandler
    If we amnesty Chauncey we can get him to sign
    and lo and behold our center came on line
    To block some shots, pull rebounds sublime
    To root on the scrubs during garbage time
    To talk on defense, call someone out if they need it
    No one’s to big, no star too conceited
    He’ll change the culture and we will relay
    That it will all commence on Christmas day
    and the coach breathed a sigh and the bloggers rejoiced
    For it seemed like King Jimmy had finally made a good choice
    To finally exorcise the demon Isiah blight
    Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night

  3. jon abbey

    again, I recommend watching the game while only uttering the words “shump shump”. excited, congratulatory, cautionary, chiding, it’s really endless fun and works no matter how well he’s playing.

  4. JK47

    I think K-Mart will end up here. It would definitely be nice to see Jeffrightened reduced to a “break glass in case of emergency” type player.

  5. SeeWhyDee77

    12 hours. I feel like Bart Scott rite now. Can’t Wait…u kno I can’t wait. We haven’t had a front line this good since Ewing/Oak/ LJ..and to think we have twice the firepower. Whoa. Now if they can play defense collectively at least half as good as the earlier unit…this season will be special. I’m anxious to see how D’Antoni coaches this unit. For as much as I bashed his coaching with my old school bias, I hafta admit that he really is a really good coach. With his offensive acumen, it’s really gonna be interesting to see how he handles a team with more defensive ability than he’s ever had in the NBA. It’s also gonna be interesting to see how he gets the most out of Stat and Melo. Can’t wait.

  6. SeeWhyDee77

    JK47:
    I think K-Mart will end up here. It would definitely be nice to see Jeffrightened reduced to a “break glass in case of emergency” type player.

    I agree..I like JJ’s role, but I also think Martin would be a great fit on that second unit. Can u imagine the potential of this defense when u have his and Chandler’s defensive intensity along with JJ’s, Douglas’, Balkman, and Shump’s ability?? I also think Jorts is an underrated defender. Martin would squeeze him out of the rotation, unless he carves a role at the center position. I really like Jorts. Funny tho cuz when he was drafted I had the WTF face for like 3 days lol. But I like his willingness to do the dirty work. Setting hard screens, bang in the paint..things like that. Plus he seems to have a high bball IQ and a reliable J. Thanks Donnie, for laying the ground work..and thanks Glen for continuing with the plan. Go Knicks!

  7. llcoolbp

    My wife wanted to got the 10:30 mass (11:30 NYC time). I said hellz no! Now we are going to the 8:30 am mass instead. Plenty of tie to spare before the knick game. I’m so giddy I can’t sleep. Sucks that I have to be in church in a few hours. Thoughts of the Knicks should sustain my energy.

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