Statistical Analysis. Humor. Knicks.

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Quick Reaction: Knicks 115, Pacers 100

(EDITOR’S NOTE: The first three bullet points are by that sartorial dandy, Jim Cavan. Credit [or blame] should be duly apportioned)

Indiana Pacers 100 Final
Recap | Box Score
115 New York Knicks
Carmelo Anthony, SF 23 MIN | 4-12 FG | 4-5 FT | 7 REB | 5 AST | 12 PTS | +16

Let’s let the great Elvis Costello handle this one. Sing along, kids!

He’s a fine figure of a man and handsome too
With his eyes upon the secret places he’d like to undo
Still he knows who knows who and where and how
And I hope you’re happy now

He’s got all the things you need and some that you will never
But you make him sound like frozen food, his love will last forever
Still he knows what you want and what you don’t allow
And I hope you’re happy now

I hope that you’re happy now like you’re supposed to be
And I know that this will hurt you more than it hurts me

He’s acting innocent and proud still you know what he’s after
Like a matador with his pork sword, while we all die of laughter
In his turquoise pajamas and motorcycle hat
I hope you’re happy now because you’ll soon put pay to that
I knew then what I know now I never loved you anyhow
And I hope you’re happy now

Not a great shooting night, but tough defense on Granger and more than a few swell passes out of traffic. I hope you’re happy now, Melo. Because you’re certainly playing as if your shrunken, Grinch-like heart has grown three sizes to-day. Keep doing ish like this and there’ll be plenty of joy in Knickville.

Amare Stoudemire, PF 28 MIN | 3-9 FG | 2-2 FT | 6 REB | 0 AST | 8 PTS | +14

STAT had a few moments of springy bliss, but he also boinked quite a few wholly makeable shots. His defense, however was seriously improved. I guess he is a one-dimensional player, but can chose one and only one dimension to inhabit per game. Dimensions Per Game (DPG), as a quantitative statistic, will be thoroughly investigated at next year’s Sloan Conference at MIT

Tyson Chandler, C 27 MIN | 8-11 FG | 0-0 FT | 7 REB | 0 AST | 16 PTS | +23

I have no doubt that in an extra large seat way in the back of the Pacers’ chartered flight, Roy Hibbert is curling himself into a fetal ball, his body wracked with fever, surrounded by a stack of spent asthma inhalers he’s been banging hits off of, trying desperately to get a buzz and eradicate every memory from his pummeled cortex of the seemingly thousand-limbed, scowling, Grendel-like behemoth who obliterated his game tonight. TYSON SMASH

Landry Fields, G 33 MIN | 1-5 FG | 5-8 FT | 7 REB | 4 AST | 7 PTS | +3

Speaking of potentially drug-addled performers, Fields was seriously channeling Chuckie Knoblauch tonight . It’s truly perplexing how godawful and out of control some of his “dishes” can be considering he delivered with aplob on more than a few pick and rolls. Throughout the 1st quarter he looked like he’d gobbled twelve pixie sticks and chased it with a case of Jolt Cola, to both good and ill effect — deflecting passes, snagging a gaggle of boards and the aforementioned ugly turnovers. For the youths out there — Jolt is a highly caffinated soda that one drank before the Reds Bulls came along. Durned whippersnappers…git offa my e-lawn!

Jeremy Lin, PG 26 MIN | 3-7 FG | 6-6 FT | 5 REB | 5 AST | 13 PTS | +17

For all the hurly burly from the fourth estate in today’s fish wrappers about Lin losing his starting role and the ephemeral qualities of “Linsanity”, the pun-tastic headlines and t-shirts it inspired, Young Master Jeremy played a very solid, in control game in which the ball was, in fact, in his hands for a vast majority of his time on the floor. He didn’t force shots, did a swell job of keeping Darren Collison on the perimeter, and would have had at least 4-5 more assists if his teammates hadn’t blown so many bunnies at the tin.

Media feeding frenzy aside, he’s a good, developing point guard. Wait, does that sound too measured? Right…JEREMY LIN IS A GOLDEN GOD. I LOVES HIM SO MUCH. HIS FARTS SMELL LIKE LAVENDER AND HE’S WELCOME TO MARRY MY SISTER. Much better…

Mike Bibby, PG 3 MIN | 1-2 FG | 0-0 FT | 0 REB | 1 AST | 3 PTS | -5

Mike Bibby: Human Victory Embalming Fluid.

Baron Davis, PG 7 MIN | 3-3 FG | 0-0 FT | 1 REB | 1 AST | 7 PTS | +6

Before suffering a strained filamentous biomaterial found in the follicles in the dermis around the mandible (beard), the Baron was having hisself a nice lil’ game. Hopefully he’s taking undergoing a serious course of dihydrotestosterone and will heal up right quick. Like by tomorrow. Pretty please?

Jared Jeffries, PF 10 MIN | 2-3 FG | 1-3 FT | 1 REB | 0 AST | 5 PTS | +7

A short stint for Jared, who astoundingly has become a crowd favorite. Jared-y things abounded, but folks will remember him, like an ectomorphic Maxiimus, whipping the crowd into a semi-delirious frenzy as they demanded that Woodson throw the saddest lion of them all, Mike Bibby into the arena.

Steve Novak, SF 20 MIN | 4-8 FG | 0-0 FT | 2 REB | 0 AST | 12 PTS | +4

The other day when the ‘Bockers were getting their hides tanned by the right proper San Antonians, I remarked that when Stever Novak was guarding Matt Bonner it was like he was facing his ideological doppelganger, possibly resulting in a collapse of the multiverse. Tonight, when Novakaine took on that slope-browed knucke-dragger, Tyler Hansbrough, I kept flashing to the movie Vision Quest. For those who missed it, the plot centers around an remarkably un-athletic Matthew Modine furiously trying to drop weight and/or bed Linda Evangelista (she’s nekkid at one point in the flick, Teehee!) whilst he preps for a HS wrestling match versus a local tough named “Shoop.” Spoiler alert: Novak/Modine wins, just like tonight! Plus, the uber-informative Clyde Frazier tonight informed us that “He’s [Novak} always coming to the game & touching my suits.” I’ll let y’all decide what to make of that.

J.R. Smith, SG 27 MIN | 6-11 FG | 2-2 FT | 3 REB | 3 AST | 16 PTS | +10

Smith appears to have found his shot. It was clearly buried in a headless woman’s posterior, hence the tweet. I was going to mention the smart play that J.R. pulled at the end of the 3rd to hold for the last shot, but any thought of uttering “smart” and “Smith” in the same sentence was obliterated by his late game sausage impersonation. Woodson yanked him tout suite and appeared to tell him in no uncertain terms to CUT THAT ISH OUT. Good. I’m still prematurely worried this is going to come back to bite them in the tuckus tomorrow. Of Smith, Mike Breen, in what may be the understatement of the current millenium said, “He doesn’t seem to get it.” Ya think?

Jerome Jordan, C 3 MIN | 0-0 FG | 0-0 FT | 1 REB | 1 AST | 0 PTS | -5

You may recall that my Pop thinks Landry Fields should be called “Larry Fields,” because he just doesn’t cotton to players with two last names. Tonight he called me during the 4th and added that he doesn’t like players with two first names either. Jordan Jerome does sound slightly better, don’tcha think?

Iman Shumpert, G 26 MIN | 3-7 FG | 2-2 FT | 3 REB | 2 AST | 9 PTS | -2

Iman was going full throttle during, as the eminence grise, Marv Albert, would say, “Serious gar-BAHZ” time. Shump Shump only knows two speeds, “Ridiculous speed” and “Ludicrous Speed” for all you spaceballs fans out there.

Josh Harrellson, F 8 MIN | 3-3 FG | 0-0 FT | 1 REB | 0 AST | 7 PTS | -13

Jorts made some nice backdoor cuts and evidently his outside shot wasn’t left in a blood-stained heap surrounded by spare tendons, ligaments, and gristle in some backwoods country doctor’s operating table/taxidermist’s office.

Five Things We Saw

  1. JIM CAVAN SEZ: The dust has barely settled on Mike D’Antoni’s nuclear departure, and already his former team has bludgeoned their first two post-tenure opponents by a combined 57 points. Fifty-seven, as in approximately the number of times this season alone that I’ve taken Vida Blue fastball grips on my possessions and hurled them at walls. The “new coach honeymoon” phenomenon is a familiar one, but I can’t recall seeing one quite this torrid – at least in the NBA. At this point, D’Antoni has to feel like the cast-off wife whose ex just sent them a DVD labeled “I’m sorry,” only to throw it on and find out it’s actually three hours of him doing tantric with the new flame.
  2. JIM CAVAN SEZ: The Knicks were a mere six buckets away from having 10 players score in double figures. As such, doesn’t look like Woodson’s propensity for platoon substitutions is going anywhere any time soon, particularly if the bench continues to contribute as they have these first two games. For a guy often identified as harboring “conservative” basketball philosophies, this Bolshevik share the wealth shit is as surprising as it is refreshing.
  3. JIM CAVAN SEZ: Conventional wisdom has it that Mike Woodson’s notoriously short point guard leash will go further in undoing Linsanity than any sticky-handed forward ever could. While we haven’t seen the chain yanked on Lin yet, Woodson did make it a point to pump BDizzle’s breaks on his behalf after an errant second quarter pass. But there’s nothing in the Basketball Bible to suggest the laisez faire approach taken by D’Antoni is necessarily better than Woodson’s – for all we know, Lin might actually respond better if he knows four turnovers in two minutes or trying to thread a 60-foot bounce pass between eight legs could mean watching the rest of the game swimming in Jort farts.
  4. I SEZ: Apparently one thing that didn’t get the boot along with Mr. Pringles is the tradition of having a different stunningly attractive woman sitting behind the Knick bench just to the left of Coach [insert head coach's name]‘s shoulder. The thing is, it’s not the same acteonizingly pretty female, leading me to believe that there’s a horde of model/actress friends who are sharing the cost of those jillion dollar fancy Spike Lee-type seats. I also hope that I they read Knickerblogger, find my prose witty and charming and will either let me use their tickets or maybe just brush their hair or listen to them complain about what mean, mean-faced jerks their rich boyfriends are while we play Tori Amos CD’s. Hey, if this team can execute a neck-spraining 180 turnaround like this, anything is possible. Hope springs eternal!
  5. I SEZ: So you know how I went all “Dazed and Confused” in the Game Thread? Well, ironically, said film stars Jason London, an actor who happens to have an identical twin brother named Jeremy who is famous for the TV show, “Party of Five.” You remember? Jennifer Love Hewitt, pre-Lost Matthew Fox, Neve Campbell? Kind of a big deal. Anyhoo, I actually appeared in a film with the other London brother. It’s a pretty awful straight to DVD bit of tripe called, “Chasing the Green.” If you scroll waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy down, you’ll see me, under my stage name, Robert Saietta (long story). I had two scenes w/Jeremy “Party of Five” London. You know how in a movie when two people are talking you’ll see the shot from one person’s point of view and then the other? It’s called an OTS shot (over the shoulder). When you’re shooting it, you’ll do the whole scene over one person’s shoulder with multiple takes, etc. and then move the camera, lights and do it from the other person’s POV. For my scenes, we spent about an hour doing all his lines w/the camera over my shoulder pointed at him. Then, when the time came to shoot w/the camera on me Mister London left to go sit in his trailer and told an assistant director read his lines with me. You know, cause he’s such a big star he doesn’t have to deign to act when the camera isn’t squarely on his precious mug. I was so taken aback, so flummoxed I didn’t even say anything. I was about to ask someone what the eff was going on but the director didn’t even bat an eye. I’ve since discovered that this isn’t an uncommon event, but long story short, JEREMY LONDON IS DICK. Back at it tomorrow, mes gars!

43 comments on “Quick Reaction: Knicks 115, Pacers 100

  1. Z-man

    In a way, It’s better that we have to play a tough schedule going in. If we make the playoffs, we want to be hardened by adversity, and on a roll going in.

  2. Doug

    “Mike Bibby: Human Victory Embalming Fluid”

    lolololol

    Add that to the Vision Quest references (LUNATIC FRIIIIIINGE) I KNOW YR OUT THERE) and everything about this is aces.

  3. ruruland

    Doug:
    “Mike Bibby: Human Victory Embalming Fluid”

    lolololol

    Add that to the Vision Quest references (LUNATIC FRIIIIIINGE) I KNOW YR OUT THERE) and everything about this is aces.

    Yeah, might be the best write-up yet, and that’s saying something.

  4. Jake S.

    Brilliant write-up as always, but you failed to mention that the Garden crowd performed the world’s FIRST SUCCESSFUL SEANCE.

  5. Owen

    Chandler was unbelievable tonight.
    Jeffries is back from injury – still a giraffe on roller skates
    I would have loved to hear Woodson’s chat with JR after the tech.

    Good win people….

  6. ruruland

    “We’ve got to understand what we’re facing. This is an extremely talented team, maybe one of the most talented teams in the NBA, and they’re playing with a renewed sense of urgency because of the coaching change like all teams do with coaching changes,” Pacers coach Frank Vogel said. “So they’re a force right now.”

  7. Mulligan

    I seriously believe there’s a decent chance that Boston misses the playoffs instead of us. Especially if they lose to teams like Sacramento.

    Now if GS could start a furious 4th qtr comeback..

  8. er

    lol wishful thinking

    Mulligan:
    I seriously believe there’s a decent chance that Boston misses the playoffs instead of us. Especially if they lose to teams like Sacramento.

    Now if GS could start a furious 4th qtr comeback..

  9. TheRant

    All I can say is that I was there tonight and the Garden was downright giddy. It almost doesn’t matter if Novak hits or misses, the crowd swells are amazing. And Jared. And Chandler about ten times over. Oh lordy. It was just amazing to see our fine friends playing some defense again. I can sleep well tonight.

  10. llcoolbp

    Great win. 22 games left. Just glanced at the schedule. I think its is definitely possible for this team to go 14-8 the rest of the way. They have and 8 game stretch before an easier final 5 that is brutal. With a games against boston (might be fighting for the playoffs and/or division), home and home vs. the bulls, game vs the heat, and games against indiana, orlando, and the bucks (all 3 teams will be fighting for positioning and/or the playoffs). They go 14-8 they finish 34-32. I don’t see the bucks finishing with a better record then that. I beleive they will get the 8 seed. The question is, can they really become dominant, and go on a run, like they did during Linsanity, and finish 16-6 or so. Then they can go 36-30, and have a good shot at leapfrogging boston and maybe even take the division from philly. Just Leapfrogging boston really means nothing in the grand scheme. The 7 or 8 seed gets you the bulls or the heat. Either way its going to be tough for this team to get higher then the 7 seed, unless they go on a run. We shall see. It would really suck to get the 8 seed and get bounced in 5 games by the heat.

  11. d-mar

    er:
    wow their next four are pretty brutal and the beginning of april is quite harsh for the Cs

    They play Miami THREE times in March and April, go Heat!

  12. formido

    This was going to happen regardless of what happened with D’Antoni, as I’ve said everywhere for weeks, including here before and during the losing streak. It’s irritating that this will be seen as some sort of reaction to the coaching change. Maybe there was a little more energy, but the fact is, the previous 7 games before this stretch were really hard, the cast was just learning to integrate itself, two of the Knick’s best defensive players missed time, and several winnable games were lost at the end. People want to win each game so bad that they constantly overreact to a small sample of bad outcomes, even when there’s plenty of explanatory context. The team showed at times what it was capable of when everything was clicking. Reps ACTUALLY MATTER. That’s not just lip service. It’s something you actually have to take into account when predicting how teams will do, not just acknowledge and then completely ignore in the next breath. There’s a reason why Miami lost 5 in a row in the first half of last season.

  13. er

    hey you are speaking reason…but here in knick land linsanity has replaced reason…and we have been so disappointed by stat and melo that its hard to blame people for overreacting

    formido:
    This was going to happen regardless of what happened with D’Antoni, as I’ve said everywhere for weeks, including here before and during the losing streak. It’s irritating that this will be seen as some sort of reaction to the coaching change. Maybe there was a little more energy, but the fact is, the previous 7 games before this stretch were really hard, the cast was just learning to integrate itself, two of the Knick’s best defensive players missed time, and several winnable games were lost at the end. People want to win each game so bad that they constantly overreact to a small sample of bad outcomes, even when there’s plenty of explanatory context. The team showed at times what it was capable of when everything was clicking. Reps ACTUALLY MATTER. That’s not just lip service. It’s something you actually have to take into account when predicting how teams will do, not just acknowledge and then completely ignore in the next breath. There’s a reason why Miami lost 5 in a row in the first half of last season.

  14. jon abbey

    formido:
    This was going to happen regardless of what happened with D’Antoni, as I’ve said everywhere for weeks, including here before and during the losing streak. It’s irritating that this will be seen as some sort of reaction to the coaching change. Maybe there was a little more energy, but the fact is, the previous 7 games before this stretch were really hard, the cast was just learning to integrate itself, two of the Knick’s best defensive players missed time, and several winnable games were lost at the end. People want to win each game so bad that they constantly overreact to a small sample of bad outcomes, even when there’s plenty of explanatory context. The team showed at times what it was capable of when everything was clicking. Reps ACTUALLY MATTER. That’s not just lip service. It’s something you actually have to take into account when predicting how teams will do, not just acknowledge and then completely ignore in the next breath. There’s a reason why Miami lost 5 in a row in the first half of last season.

    I agree with this to an extent and think we saw the beginnings of consistent effort against Chicago, but D’Antoni still needed to go.

  15. limpidgimp

    On at least two of Novak’s triples, Jeffries set great screens on Novak’s defender to get him open. And Jeffries hustling back and blocking that shot was awesome. I really missed this guy; so glad to see him back.

  16. ruruland

    jon abbey: I agree with this to an extent and think we saw the beginnings of consistent effort against Chicago, but D’Antoni still needed to go.

    During D’Antoni, I talked a lot about the 31-6 run Denver made in ’04 after hiring George Karl, a man whom garnered instant respect from its veteran core (Martin, Russel, Miller, Camby,Buckner, Najera).

    One of the first things Karl did was re-establish a team hierarchy, placing much more trust in his veterans in decision-making on both ends of the floor (giving Camby and Martin the ability to help and roam a lot more on defense, making them the linebackers of the unit, and allowing Andre Miller to call his own game on offense, moving away from the highly structured sets of former cadet Jeff Bzdelik)

    While you can’t compare markets, the expectations on that team heading into the season were extremely high. Just like this team, you could see what they could be in glimpses. They could never sustain their effort, however, and the team lacked an identity on both ends of the floor as well as a purpose–who would do what and when.

    Their star player, Melo, was about as bad as he’s been this year in terms of scoring efficiency. They couldn’t shoot as a team, and things just seemed to get worse over time in terms of how they looked. When you are losing without an apparent end-game for improvement, the bad effort and selfishness start to creep in.

    Coinciding with Karl’s hire, they signed Wesley Person, a journeyman marksman on his last leg. Person made 12 of his first 24 3’s off the bench and by the fourth or fifth game, his shooting became contagious and Denver went on a 10 game tear ( in the middle of their 31-6 run) where they averaged about 115 points a game, winning by an average of close to 20 points per game.

    http://www.basketball-reference.com/teams/DEN/2005_games.html

  17. Will the Thrill

    D’antoni obviously needed to go, but it is easy to see that teams just try harder/play better when they acquire a new coach or fire one. Look at the Blazers. Hopefully they can keep this up though, that’d be freakin’ awesome.

  18. ruruland

    Will the Thrill:

    A lot of similarities between this year and the ’05 Nuggets. I think they’re about to go on a huge run.

    It’s not that these guys didn’t like MDA, or even that they didn’t respect him, I just don’t think his message was resonating. We never know exactly what that message is, but to me, this is a group of guys that was ready to hear something else and try something else.

    This can be a scary good team, and honestly and 18-4 kind of run is totally within the realm of reason. They might need a couple of breaks in a few tight games, but they’re due for those, too.

  19. ruruland

    “Lin is Lin,” Anthony said. “I don’t think Lin is paying attention to any of that stuff that is going on right now. Lin is about winning. Lin is about this team. Lin is about doing things to help this team win. As far as the Linsanity thing goes, it’s still there.

  20. ruruland

    During shootaround at the Knicks’ training facility Friday morning, Mike Woodson called for a brief meeting. But it didn’t entail a film or strategy session to prepare for the Pacers. The Knicks’ new interim head coach, who the players view as a very matter-of-fact guy, had a message for his team.

    “He just came in and basically told us how good he knows we can be,” Steve Novak said. “He just told us we need to focus in and we need to take advantage of this time that we have as a group like this, because you can be on a lot of teams and never really feel like you have a special group. We feel like we have a special group right now.”

    “I think one of our new approaches is really making our defense felt very much, being aggressive, maybe a little over aggressive just to be felt by the other team,” he said. “I think we’ve responded well to it and I think it’s helped us. I think just the confidence of knowing like if you’re a little over aggressive, it’s fine.”

    “This is the most talented team I’ve ever had,” said Woodson, who previously was the head coach of three playoff teams in Atlanta.

  21. JK47

    Sorry to be a pessimist here, but I’m fully expecting a loss tomorrow. The Knicks do not have a road win against a quality team this entire season. They’re 7-14 on the road and the 7 wins have come against Sacramento, Washington, Detroit, Charlotte, Washington again, Minnesota and Toronto. The only team in that group that isn’t among the dregs of the NBA is Minnesota, and the Knicks needed a miraculous comeback to pull that one out.

    If the Knicks lose tomorrow we’ll know they’re just the same old Knicks. Capable of beating a decent opponent at home every now and then, but unable to get quality road wins. If they win tomorrow I’ll allow myself to feel hopeful that something’s changed.

  22. Kikuchiyo

    Great recap.

    In related D’Antoni news: Did anyone see Nash’s line tonight? 34 minutes and TWO shots (he made one of them). 17 assists and, yes, another W. Suns are now at .500 and the second best player on that team is………

    Marcin Gortat?
    The 56-year-old Grant Hill?

    Don’t ever pooh-pooh Nash’s MVPs. The dude earns his accolades.

  23. Coachjpark

    Getting the 7th seed, in my opinion, would be much better than getting the 8th seed as it appears the Knicks match up better against the Bulls.

  24. BigBlueAL

    Coachjpark:
    Getting the 7th seed, in my opinion, would be much better than getting the 8th seed as it appears the Knicks match up better against the Bulls.

    The Bulls currently are the #1 seed. Last season they finished with the #1 seed ahead of the Heat and it looks like the same thing will happen this season.

  25. 2FOR18

    Loved the effort! Wish it was there all season, but I also wish I was a little bit taller, wish I was a baller, wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her….

    Woodson a +57 so far!

    Did Bibby really manage a -5 in 3 minutes, even while scoring 3 points himself and getting an assist?!

  26. JC Knickfan

    yehudi3000:
    what are the chance that steve novak is gooing to remain a knicks next year?

    I think we could only offer him the league minimum. We probably going to lose him.

  27. JC Knickfan

    2FOR18:
    Loved the effort!Wish it was there all season, but I also wish I was a little bit taller, wish I was a baller, wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her….

    Woodson a +57 so far!

    Did Bibby really manage a -5 in 3 minutes, even while scoring 3 points himself and getting an assist?!

    Yes – Pacers scored 42 pt 4th QT. Shump or Melo can play backup PG or point forward tonight. Bibby needs to stay on bench.

  28. Cousyfan

    Please note the one constancy in ALL the wins the past six weeks. The one constancy was the presence of Tyson and Jeremy. It was not the presence of the coach, Melo, and Amare.
    Cheers

  29. jon abbey

    Cousyfan:
    Sorry!
    I left off Fields in that one constancy.
    Cheers
    I amretired math professor

    those three were there for a lot of losses too, my man. Fields is still the 9th or 10th best player on the team, but at least he contributed some Shump-like energy in the first quarter for once last night.

    again, as I wrote at the end of the game thread, no Knicks team since Dec 2003 has won back to back games by 57 or more points. obviously to make the playoffs this year, they need to bring this kind of effort every single game, but to not be a bit optimistic after those two games is crazy. and a loss tonight (against the 6th or 7th best team in the league on the road) also wouldn’t kill the season, they need to go 13-7 or 12-8 plus beat Milwaukee both times, that is within the realm of possibility whether or not they win tonight.

  30. yehudi3000

    JC Knickfan: I think we could only offer him the league minimum. We probably going to lose him.

    damn, are you sure? i think he won us like 5 games this season at least.

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