Statistical Analysis. Humor. Knicks.

Thursday, September 20, 2018

Knicks Morning News (2018.09.14)

  • [NYDN] Here’s how King Kong will be brought to life on Broadway
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 3:00:00 AM)

    “King Kong” is roaring to life on Broadway and it takes a village to get the 20-foot high, 2,000-pound ape in action on stage.

    The giant soulful star of the musical that starts previews Oct. 5 can crumble to the ground in exhaustion, soar towards the ceiling, and express everything from rage to…

  • [NYDN] ‘Thomas & Friends’ owner fires back after NRA show portrays characters in KKK hoods
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 3:00:00 AM)

    That idea sure Tank-ed!

    Mattel — the company that owns Thomas the Tank Engine — is firing back at NRA TV host Dana Loesch for portraying “Thomas & Friends” characters in Ku Klux Klan hoods.

    On Friday, Loesch showed characters from the children’s TV show “Thomas & Friends” in white hoods while discussing…

  • [NYDN] Women model lingerie in windows overlooking High Line in the name of body positivity during New York Fashion Week
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 3:00:00 AM)

    Visitors to the High Line got quite an eyeful Wednesday when a diverse group of women posed in lingerie in the floor-to-ceiling windows of new apartments for a New York Fashion Week presentation.

    The hour-long show, which featured 26 women standing in four floors of the apartments, was part of…

  • [NYDN] Detective alleges boss attacked her – and she was punished
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 3:00:00 AM)

    An NYPD detective says she was ordered to hand over her gun and shield and take a pysch test after she reported an alleged assault at the hands of her boss in the department’s Hate Crimes Unit.

    Detective Nela Gomez, 38, claims a lieutenant went on a foul mouthed tirade and slammed his office door…

  • [NYDN] Facts are facts, President Trump: A professor who studied Puerto Rico’s death toll responds
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 2:00:00 AM)

    Science is more powerful than a tweet. It always will be.

    No tweet, regardless of authorship, can erase the catastrophic effects of Hurricane Maria. Today, if you want to measure the impact of that storm, all you need to do is take a plane to Puerto Rico.

    As your plane approaches the airport, you…

  • [NYDN] The stupid war on vaping: If anything, electronic nicotine delivery is saving lives from cigarettes
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 2:00:00 AM)

    Juul, a discreet, streamlined e-cigarette that resembles a USB drive, is pretty cool. That’s an advantage for Juul Labs, helping it attract more than 70% of the U.S. market, but also a problem, because teenagers like cool things.

    This week, the Food and Drug Administration sent letters to Juul…

  • [NYDN] Waiting for Godot at NYCHA
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 1:05:00 AM)

    If any corner of the wretched New York City Housing Authority had cause to hope for a turnaround, it was Holmes Towers, near Gracie Mansion — first in line for what Mayor de Blasio in 2015 cheered would be “approximately half a billion dollars in resources for NYCHA to address its ongoing capital…

  • [NYDN] Florence, begone: Holding our breath for the Carolinas
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 1:00:00 AM)

    A fearsome hurricane bears down on the Carolinas this morning.

    We who six years ago were walloped by a monster storm, who are still in many ways struggling to recover — we need another rail tunnel under the Hudson River, stat — hold our breaths and hope for the best.

    May the wind die down and the…

  • [NYDN] Readers sound off on 9/11 firefighters, clean energy and Uber
    (Friday, September 14, 2018 12:00:00 AM)

    Honor cancer-felled 9/11 firefighters

    Yorktown Heights, N.Y.: The FDNY does not officially classify the 9/11-related cancer deaths of firefighters as line-of-duty deaths, and they are not counted as part of the tally of firefighters who have died in the line of duty since 1865. Fire Commissioner…

  • [NYDN] Man, 42, shot in his car and critically wounded in Queens
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 10:30:00 PM)

    An armed attacker shot a 42-year-old man as he sat in his car in Queens Thursday night, critically wounding him, cops said.

    Cops found the 42-year-old victim after he crashed his Honda into a utility pole at 144th Ave. and 249th St. in Rosedale just after 10:20 p.m.

    Medics rushed him to Jamaica…

  • [NYDN] ‘IT LOOKED LIKE ARMAGEDDON': Gas explosions rip through dozens of homes north of Boston; teen killed by falling chimney
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 10:00:00 PM)

    Dozens of gas explosions tore through numerous homes in Boston late Thursday, leading to one reported death and mass evacuations of several neighborhoods.

    Massachusetts State Police responded to 70 separate explosions in Lawrence, Andover and North Andover by 7:30 p.m., where at least 39 homes…

  • [NYDN] Hurricane Florence’s onslaught could cue disaster in North Carolina
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 9:35:00 PM)

    WILMINGTON, N.C. — Hurricane Florence already has inundated coastal streets with ocean water and left tens of thousands without power, and forecasters say conditions will only worsen as the hulking storm slogs inland.

    Screaming winds bent trees toward the ground and raindrops flew sideways as Florence’s…

  • [NYDN] ‘The Tonight Show’ with Jimmy Fallon goes live from Central Park for the first time
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 9:30:00 PM)

    Jimmy Fallon’s latest gig was a walk in the park.

    The “Tonight Show” host swapped 30 Rock for Central Park Thursday for a taping of his chat fest that featured appearances from stars like Blake Lively, Carrie Underwood and a few surprise guests.

    The star-studded affair, which took place at Rumsey…

  • [NYDN] Bronx man accused of helping brother kill ex-roommate held without bail
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 9:15:00 PM)

    He gave his brother a helping hand — and that hand was attached to a gun.

    A Bronx man accused of fatally shooting his brother’s ex-roommate while the victim’s girlfriend watched in horror has been ordered held without bail after his arrest on murder charges.

    Michael Rodriguez, 29, was arraigned…

  • [NYDN] Daily Horoscope — September 14, 2018
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 9:00:00 PM)

    Via Tarot Astrologers

    General Horoscope for September 14, 2018

    We are mentally agile as clever Mercury grows closer to the Sun every day. But our logic may not be as sound as we prefer while Mercury forms anxious aspects with confrontational Mars and unconventional Uranus. Meanwhile, the shrewd…

  • [NYDN] LOVETT: Cuomo vulnerability was more hope than reality
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 8:15:00 PM)

    In the end, Gov. Cuomo’s vulnerability was more hope on the part of the far left wing of the Democratic party than reality.

    Cuomo wracked up a huge primary win against actress Cynthia Nixon, who was barely able to surpass the 33% lesser-known and underfunded Zephyr Teachout did against the governor…

  • [NYDN] Yankees gain breathing room in Wild Card race as Athletics fall to Baltimore
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 8:15:00 PM)

    Dylan Bundy had eight strikeouts in six solid innings, and the Baltimore Orioles ended the Oakland Athletics’ six-game winning streak with a 5-3 victory Thursday night.

    Stephen Piscotty homered for the A’s, who fell 3½ games behind first-place Houston in the AL West and 1½ back of the Yankees for…

  • [NYDN] ‘Threat becomes reality': Florence begins days of rain and wind
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 7:45:00 PM)

    The big slosh has begun, and the consequences could be disastrous.

    Hurricane Florence’s leading edge battered the Carolina coast Thursday, bending trees and shooting frothy sea water over streets on the Outer Banks, as the hulking storm closed in with 100 mph winds for a drenching siege that could…

  • [NYDN] Man arrested after shooting Minnesota deputy with crossbow
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 7:40:00 PM)

    SAUK CENTRE, Minn. — Authorities say a man who shot a Minnesota sheriff’s deputy with a crossbow also was shot and wounded by law officers firing their guns.

    Stearns County Sheriff Don Gudmunson says the deputy was shot in the forearm Thursday and was taken to a hospital, where he is in good condition….

  • [NYDN] Fantasy football Week 2 lineup rankings
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 6:10:00 PM)

    Adrian Peterson?looked like he entered the?DeLorean?in Week 1, rushing 26 times for 96 yards and a touchdown. Yes, it’s just 3.7 yards per carry, but if he continues to approach or even exceed 20 carries per game, he’s a Top-24 RB. AP also added two receptions for 70 yards, reminding us of the…

  • [NYDN] Top 10: David Wright’s most memorable moments of his Amazin’ Mets career
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 5:20:00 PM)

    With David Wright effectively announcing Thursday he will hang up the cleats after returning for one more game on Sept. 29, we remember some his most memorable plays during his storied career.

    July 21, 2004 — THE DEBUT

    After a brief stint in Triple-A, the Mets call-up phenom Wright to fill the…

  • [NYDN] Nicki Minaj, Cardi B continue their feud — this time picking sides in the New York gubernatorial race
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 5:15:00 PM)

    Score one for Nicki Minaj.

    The rapper and her nemesis Cardi B came out on opposite sides of New York’s Democratic gubernatorial primary, as the Queens-born Minaj sides with incumbent Gov. Cuomo and Cardi B, raised in the Bronx, endorsed Cynthia Nixon.

    By Thursday night, it looked like Minaj was…

  • [NYDN] Salsa great Gilberto Santa Rosa celebrates 40 years in music with HBO Latino concert special
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 5:00:00 PM)

    To celebrate his four decades in music, Gilberto Santa Rosa didn’t hold back.

    Known as El Caballero de la Salsa — the Gentleman of Salsa — the Puerto Rican singer marks his 40 years in the business with the HBO Latino concert special “Gilberto Santa Rosa: 40 y Contando,” set to debut Friday, Sept….

  • [NYDN] School bus complaint line hits 67,075 calls in four days, even chancellor can’t get student to class on time
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 5:00:00 PM)

    Schools Chancellor Richard Carranza personally intervened to help a student with disabilities left stranded amid the city’s yellow bus crisis, but even that child was late for school Thursday as problems again engulfed bus lines across the city.

    Bronx dad Alphonso Reyes emailed Carranza Wednesday…

  • [NYDN] Gov. Cuomo defeats Nixon easily in bitter Democratic primary battle
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 4:50:00 PM)

    After a bitter six-month battle, Gov. Cuomo Thursday easily beat back a primary challenge from his left flank from actress Cynthia Nixon.

    With nearly 99% of election districts reporting as of midnight, Cuomo was ahead 64.4% to 33.9%.

    For the governor, who is seeking a third term, it was his toughest…

  • [SNY Knicks] Knicks’ 2019 offseason plan has Kyrie Irving as ‘their first, second, third and fourth choice’
    (Thursday, September 13, 2018 11:12:03 AM)

    The rumors continue to swirl around the Knicks’ plans for this upcoming offseason, and Celtics G Kyrie Irving is right in the middle of them. In fact, he may be the most important piece.

  • 56 comments on “Knicks Morning News (2018.09.14)

    1. Totes McGoats as Totes McGoats

      I wonder..
      If Burke has a good season and Ntilikina takes a real step forward, does the team still throw money at Kyrie’s feet? If the brain trust really does have their hearts set on Kyrie, then Fizdale should showcase Burke in the 1st half of the season and trade him for a pick. At that salary, that should be an easy move. Hell, they may be able to sell him to Phoenix for a pick right now.
      What say ye?

    2. Donnie Walsh

      Hell, they may be able to sell him to Phoenix for a pick right now.
      What say ye?

      Maybe for an ice pick, since Phoenix doesn’t really get that cold. But I’d say even a guitar pick or an afro pick would be asking for too much at this point.

    3. GHenman

      My hope is that Frank and Trey play well enough to be our pg’s of the future. While I would love to get Kyrie, I think the likelihood of him walking away from a great team and leaving millions of dollars on the table to come to New York is highly unlikely.
      The Knicks are just not a good enough situation. More likely, his agent is using the threat of him signing with Knicks for negotiating leverage. Ditto Butler and KD. If we need to add a pg, someone like Rozier is likely a more attainable target.

    4. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      Why do you keep dodging this issue?

      Because if we have one more debate over WP48 I’m going to personally buy the board’s servers so I can set them on fire.

    5. Stratomatic "Porzingis, Ntilikina, Knox & Robinson are going to lead us to the promised land

      Because if we have one more debate over WP48 I’m going to personally buy the board’s servers so I can set them on fire.

      lmao

    6. Bruno Almeida

      Or you can shove the servers up your ass!

      It does seem like the front office’s priority is going to be Kyrie Irving, and I’m ok with it as long as it doesn’t cost too much. Get him as a free agent, no stupid trades, no losing assets, just sign the guy if you want him so much and if he’s still playing great when you have the chance. I don’t know if it’s the ideal plan but as I’ve said before, I’m happy the front office actually has a very good player as a target and seems to be patient about it.

    7. chrisk06811

      I’m not a doctor, but Cock, I recommend you do not shove the servers up your ass. Your plan to light them on fire isn’t great either, but it sounds like the better of two bad options. Kinda like who backs up Burke at GP

    8. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      I’m getting married tomorrow and going straight on a honeymoon down the OR/CA coast, so you never know what’ll happen in the heat of the moment. If Mike can overnight the servers to me, we’ll see if it’s a “fit.”

    9. Jack Bauer

      “More likely his agent is using the threat of him signing with the Knicks as leverage”.

      This sounds vaguely familiar….like it’s happened before .

      Have to agree, why would Kyrie, or Butler for that matter, want to come to the Knicks in the condition they are in? Makes no sense for them financially or from a winning standpoint.

    10. Bruno Almeida

      The only real reason for Irving wanting to come to the Knicks is that he is the one guy who’s probably crazy enough to randomly want to leave a perennial contender with young pieces for the Knicks.

      I would generally just dismiss any interest from a star as media talk or leverage building, but Irving is probably crazy enough that it might actually be true. No basketball reason makes any sense obviously, not now and not the future possibilities.

    11. The Glass Half Rebuilt

      Kyrie Irving already won a championship by taking down the greatest regular season team ever assembled, and probably wants to make a ton of money off th court. New York with Porzingis, Knox, Ntilikina, Hardaway Jr, Mitchell Robinson, *insert Duke frosh of choice here*, and a max contract wouldn’t be a bad way to do that, especially with no threat of LeBron in the conference.

    12. The Glass Half Rebuilt

      Also, don’t forget that the Knicks are the only team in the NBA that have a black POBO, GM, AGM, Director of Player Development, Head Coach, and Assistant Head Coach.

      I’m not saying it’s the best basketball decision, but LeBron would have signed in Philly or forced his way to Houston if basketball was the only thing that mattered to these guys. Kyrie Irving is enrolling in a class for athletes at Harvard Business School, and being in New York with that newfound business acumen might be his long term plan. Kyrie Irving shared a locker room with JR Smith, the NBA’s greatest New York Knicks ambassador after we paid his brother to pretend to be an NBA player for a year, and then LeBron James who sat in a meeting where the Knicks tried to sell him on how he would become a billionaire athlete in New York a decade ago. Kyrie Irving’s dad is a Bronx native, and last of all being a 27 year old multimillionaire in New York is probably the shit.

      I really do think if the Knicks land a top three pick in the NBA draft (which is a big if, but we’re terrible) that Kyrie Irving is a lock to play for New York in 2019. Irving, Zion, and KP would break TV records and be very competitive in the Eastern Conference.

    13. Stratomatic "Porzingis, Ntilikina, Knox & Robinson are going to lead us to the promised land

      I like Kyrie and I like the combination of Kyrie and Frank in the backcourt, but he’s an injury risk on a team that already has significant risk with KP. I’m also in the camp that thinks whatever a player is doing in Boston should probably be discounted a little because Stevens is such a good coach. All that said, if he’s healthy and peaking and you put him on the court with KP, Frank, Knox, and Robinson, forget servers, MSG is going be lit on fire.

    14. Z-man

      I’m getting married tomorrow…

      To Mrs. Jowles or someone else? :-)

      Enjoy your honeymoon! Hopefully the lucky gal will take at least 50 years to come to her senses. (Although the thought of a brood of li’l Jowles’ running amok is pretty terrifying, hopefully your wife has all the dominant genes)

    15. Bruno Almeida

      It’s rough because it seems every elite Point Guard is or has struggled with injuries somehow. It might just be the nature of the position in the modern NBA. Kyrie, Curry, Paul, Wall, Lowry, Thomas, even the more durable ones like Westbrook have had injury issues or are going through some. The only real durable one seems to be Lillard but even he missed some games lately.

      I don’t know if that means superstar PGs are a risky proposition and obviously not every injury is equal, some like Kyrie’s are more dangerous, but it makes it harder to assess the potential value of those guys in a max scenario.

      The good thing about the way the Knicks should be planning now is that there will be an entire season to monitor this kind of stuff and then make a decision. There’s no need to hurry up.

    16. Z-man

      Shams Charania
      ?
      Verified account

      @ShamsCharania
      34m34 minutes ago
      More
      Sources: The Knicks and center Joakim Noah are expected to part ways before training camp; team has continued to work trade calls, although waiving and stretching Noah’s contract looms as a route.

    17. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      To Mrs. Jowles or someone else? :-)

      Enjoy your honeymoon! Hopefully the lucky gal will take at least 50 years to come to her senses. (Although the thought of a brood of li’l Jowles’ running amok is pretty terrifying, hopefully your wife has all the dominant genes)

      Lady Jowles is becoming Mrs. Lady Jowles. Of course, she’s not taking the Jowles name, and also she doesn’t give a goddamn about internet arguments. She’s the yin to my yang (although if she came on the board, she’d be one of the few with an actual background in statistics to set the record straight).

    18. ptmilo

      Hearty congratulations to z-man on jowles’ imminent but ultimately ephemeral mellowing. I expect 18 months of bargnani-hyperlink free posting (i.e. max 2x a week) before a Bernard king level return to form. Given your wife’s facility with numbers maybe she can take some of the dead time between Patrick McCaw ice sculpture wedding photos to explain that dedicated servers mostly died with oasis and you couldn’t afford to buy aws if you bet every Carmelo game for 100 years with er as your counterparty.

      I got married in that part of the country a few years ago and it was an incredible setting. have a great day and congrats on getting her to agree to do it on JP tokoto’s birthday.

    19. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      It’s rough because it seems every elite Point Guard is or has struggled with injuries somehow. It might just be the nature of the position in the modern NBA. Kyrie, Curry, Paul, Wall, Lowry, Thomas, even the more durable ones like Westbrook have had injury issues or are going through some. The only real durable one seems to be Lillard but even he missed some games lately.

      Just scanning the USG% leaders each year, you can really see the decline in the SG/SF and the rise of the PG in the last five years. Iverson was such an anomaly — which was obvious, watching him play — but in 2001, it seems that you had to be a Jordanesque wing (Kobe, Stackhouse, Carter, Rip Hamilton) or a big to get that many touches. Only Iverson, Starbury and Gary Payton made the list of “pure” PGs.

      In 2018, about 7 would be considered PGs, and another 4 or 5 would be considered 2-guards (Lou Williams, Oladipo, Devin Booker, Donovan Mitchell, DeRozan), although Lou Will played 44% of his minutes at PG this year, Mitchell will probably end up in the top-5 in USG% at some point, and take on a Harden-like role over the next couple years, and Oladipo is a modern black-hole PG in the style of post-injury Derrick Rose, and should be given even more touches over the next couple years.

    20. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      Hearty congratulations to z-man on jowles’ imminent but ultimately ephemeral mellowing.

      He really is the winner here, but I’d argue that if medicinal-grade cannabis can’t quiet the argument storm within me, nothing will.

      I expect 18 months of bargnani-hyperlink free posting (i.e. max 2x a week) before a Bernard king level return to form.

      Depends how many people advocate for trading future 1sts for Andrew Wiggins this year. This is the Knicks we’re talking about.

      Given your wife’s facility with numbers maybe she can take some of the dead time between Patrick McCaw ice sculpture wedding photos to explain that dedicated servers mostly died with oasis and you couldn’t afford to buy aws if you bet every Carmelo game for 100 years with er as your counterparty.

      We both work in an industry that has close ties to the construction of data centers all over the PNW, but I’m mostly in denial about it. Can’t live my life peacefully when I really start to think about where and how my Ring Video Doorbell captures are stored.

      I got married in that part of the country a few years ago and it was an incredible setting. have a great day and congrats on getting her to agree to do it on JP tokoto’s birthday.

      Thanks for the laughs and congratulations. There’s no shortage of beautiful places up here, but a quiet beach elopement has already proved to be the smartest decision we’ve jointly made, even if it rains on Cannon Beach tomorrow. She’s the kind of woman who bought a non-traditional dress off the clearance rack at Anthropologie, requested no engagement ring whatsoever (“a sexist liability, not an asset”) and is perfectly content with $15 Gruet Blanc de Noirs (but I bought Chandon anyway), so I really have hit the jackpot with this one.

      However, I will be happily spending a month’s salary on charcuterie this week…

    21. Hubert

      While I would love to get Kyrie, I think the likelihood of him walking away from a great team and leaving millions of dollars on the table to come to New York is highly unlikely.

      Let’s break this down.

      Part 1: “I think the likelihood of him walking away from a great team”

      The dude walked away from a better team already.

      Part 2: “and leaving millions of dollars on the table”

      You sure it’s likely that Boston is going to offer him a max? It actually makes a lot of sense for them to walk away from him after this season.

    22. Donnie Walsh

      Depends how many people advocate for trading future 1sts for Andrew Wiggins this year. This is the Knicks we’re talking about.

      Well… With the Knicks desperate to find a place for Noah, and Minnesota probably the only office that would even answer the phone, isn’t it possible that this could soon become a reality? Their salaries line up perfectly if NY throws in Lance (and a pick or two, of course:)

    23. Hubert

      The only real reason for Irving wanting to come to the Knicks is that he is the one guy who’s probably crazy enough to randomly want to leave a perennial contender with young pieces for the Knicks.

      Why must we cast aspersions about his mental state? The guy will be 27 years old, worth a quarter bil after his next contract, he’s already a champion and hit one of the most famous shots in modern basketball history, and he never asked to go to Boston (which, frankly, is a shit town to spend your time in if you’re a famous African-American athlete). A man like that has to be crazy to want to spend the rest of his prime lighting up Madison Square Garden? And the Knicks aren’t as devoid of talent as the despair of Knicks fans would indicate. A guy can look at Porzingis, Hardaway, Knox, Frank, and another high lottery pick and think maybe there’s something possible there.

    24. Hubert

      I like Kyrie and I like the combination of Kyrie and Frank in the backcourt

      As pointless as it is to project this hypothetical lineup, I would suspect Kyrie and Hardaway would be our backcourt, and Frank would back them up. Frank is probably not going to take a quantum leap forward next year. A realistic expectation for him is to develop into a starter by his 4th year.

    25. Josh

      Congrats, THCJ! I just hope we don’t backslide when you’re gone. By the time you’re back, we’ll be sacrificing to a virtual golden idol of Me7o.

    26. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      There’s very little possibility that Frank shoots as badly as he did last year, especially if we’re talking the 2019-2020 season.

      He may never be a good scorer, or even anything above a Roberson-type SG, but that’s sort of the reason that you get a guy like Kyrie in the first place — to let him give 100% on offense, put him on the team’s off-ball guard, and let the long SG/SF elite defender take the primary guy on the other team, whether that’s a big PG like Simmons or a crafty one like Curry.

      Hardaway would be just fine at SG and Frank at SF if the matchup allows. It’s still not close to a championship contender unless Ntilikina becomes an efficient scorer, but I don’t see why you would keep Frank on the bench if his defense is as good as advertised. Plus, Hardaway should have no future with the team. He got a payday during a low spot for the franchise, but he shouldn’t be eating cap space if he’s as mediocre as the stats suggest.

      He’s the kind of guy who keeps you somewhere between 8-12 in the lottery. He’s not egregiously bad by any means, but by the end of his career, he’ll be one of those guys where it’s like, “Oh, he’s still playing?” Sort of like Gerald Henderson or Kirk Heinrich.

    27. Hubert

      Hardaway is overpaid. We never should have acquired him. Under no circumstances should he ever average 15 FGA’s per game like he did last year.

      But he doesn’t suck. He’s probably slightly above average at his position. Frank, on the other hand, plays great defense and has a lot of potential. But he’s terrible at basketball right now, and that’s not likely to change dramatically in one year.

      If we’re going for Kyrie, I’d expect Tim to do better at 2 guard than Frank. Of course, I would jump at the chance to dump Tim’s salary if I could.

    28. JK47

      Congrats Jowles. That drive down the Oregon coast is the best. Are you going all the way down to Big Sur? That’s my heaven on Earth. I want to retire near there.

    29. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      When I moved here, I picked up my company car in Sacto, drove up to Redding (had In and Out, which was just okay), Shasta Pass (RIP Whiskeytown) to Eureka, and then took it all the way up the coast. So no Big Sur due to the time it would take to get there and back, although Lady Jowles’s gay best friend from high school tried to convince us to stay in a $2,000 a night villa there.

      https://www.ventanabigsur.com/

      Maybe someday when I have James Dolan money. But seriously, we’re staying in Trinidad for a few nights as our southernmost point. Hoping to run into Thomas Pynchon, even if I have no idea what he looks like, still.

    30. rama, king of superfluous poppycock

      Lady Jowles sounds pretty great – congrats! Big Sur is also one of my favorite spots on earth, so if you have any chance to go there, take it. At the very least you could eat at this spectacular cliffside restaurant, Nepenthe. Worth it.

    31. rama, king of superfluous poppycock

      Also, I worked with Pynchon, but won’t say what he looks like! He has been on TV, though, as a gag in the background of a newscast on the street. So footage of him exists…

    32. Cock Jowles, #1 Purveyor of Wanton Chuckery

      Such a tease. Thanks to Josh, rama and anyone else I miss once the cheese coma sets in.

      I read an article about how IIRC Nick Offerman and Megan Mulally went to Italy on holiday and just fed each other salami and wine in the nude for weeks on end. Then he came back and realized he had a topless photo shoot for a magazine first thing upon returning.

      I’m modeling my honeymoon on whatever those two do. Can’t go wrong.

    33. Jack Bauer

      Congrats Jowles, have a great time.
      Sounds like a wonderful trip.

      We can all descend into an orgy of eye test data and opinions in your absence

    34. Owen

      Congrats THCJ!!! Awesome news.

      But in the long tradition of KB I will have to disagree. Z-man, you are not out of the woods until a little Jowler or Jowlette arrives. The data clearly shows that your first year after marriage is actually when you peak as a message board poster.and archive researcher.

      Have a great day and eat an Eddy Curry worth of charcuterie for us all….

    35. Silky Johnson, Fleet Admiral of the Tank Armada

      Gonna join the chorus of congrats for Jowles. She sounds awesome and the honeymoon will be terrific–especially the meats and cheeses!

    36. GoNyGoNyGo

      Congrats Jowles! The right mate really can complete you. Good luck and do yourself a favor, enjoy the day tomorrow. Too many people are so hyped up on their wedding day that they don’t take the time to savor the experience.

      And WOW! 2 Pynchon people on this board? Make it 3. That elevates everyone. Did either of you read … I mean finish Gravity’s Rainbow?

    37. Donnie Walsh

      To The Honorable and Lady Cock Jowles!

      Time to pop a bottle of bleach bubbly and toast the bride and groom.

      May you never win an argument with her for as long as you live.

      -DW

    38. english_knick

      Congrats Jowles! Hope you have a superb day.

      Me and a buddy cycled down that coast a few years ago – one of my favourite places on Earth. Enjoy.

    39. Stratomatic "Porzingis, Ntilikina, Knox & Robinson are going to lead us to the promised land

      Congratulations and good luck Jowles! Sounds like you got a high lottery pick!

    40. Stratomatic "Porzingis, Ntilikina, Knox & Robinson are going to lead us to the promised land

      As pointless as it is to project this hypothetical lineup, I would suspect Kyrie and Hardaway would be our backcourt, and Frank would back them up.

      If you have Kyrie, KP, and Knox on the court at the same time, that’s 3 scorers that can create for themselves. IMO, putting Hardaway on the court with them will add very little value to the offense because he’ll wind up being the 4th option and not an especially efficient one at that. He’ll also add very little to the defense. Putting Frank on the court with them won’t hurt the offense that much because he won’t be asked to even have to do very much shooting but will help the defense a lot. There may be lineups where Hardaway would be preferable like when one of those guys is out, but imo the goal is generally to get 3 scorers out there and then put them with defenders, rebounders shot blockers etc.. Of course if you can find players that do many things well, that’s even better.

      If Frank can just become a solid 3 and D guy, he’d be perfect playing off the scorers. Of course we are hoping for even more.

    41. Bruno Almeida

      @48

      This is a good point for why I’m excited for the hypothetical Kyrie Irving signing. There are 3 factors that I think are true about the current roster potential: Porzingis’ best role is going to be as a secondary scorer, an inside and outside threat that doubles as a rim protector; Frank is a very good defender who’s going to be able to guard PGs and wings very well as he gains experience and gets stronger; Knox will be mostly a scorer and not much of a creator for others, a guy who could grow to be a 3rd option on a good team.

      A heathy Irving provides everything this core needs: the number 1 option to ease the burden on KP specially for shot creation and iso / pick and roll; Frank can cover his defensive deficiencies so he can be hidden on the weaker guard on the other team; it also frees up Knox from having to do to much leaving him as a third scorer type of player for his development.

      I think it’s a great fit.

    42. llcoolbp

      Congrats Jowles!

      I’ve been married 11 years. Together 18 years with my wife. 2 kids, 5 moves later still together. Lots of ups and downs, and tough times. We’ve made it work. Sometimes it takes just that- “work”, “compromise” and all the other cliches. I wish you success and a long and happy marriage.

    43. ptmilo

      Congratulations and good luck Jowles! Sounds like you got a high lottery pick!

      Strat google translate says you just told a man on his wedding day he is foolishly rolling the dice on a total crapshoot when he should have focused on winning the trade by white knuckling the crush he had on his 38 year old eighth grade earth science teacher until she left as a free agent for boca

    44. Stratomatic "Porzingis, Ntilikina, Knox & Robinson are going to lead us to the promised land

      Strat google translate says you just told a man on his wedding day he is foolishly rolling the dice on a total crapshoot when he should have focused on winning the trade by white knuckling the crush he had on his 38 year old eighth grade earth science teacher until she left as a free agent for boca

      that was a serious lmao! :-)

      I suspect Jowles did a more thorough job of vetting his future wife than NBA teams do at the combine.

      But to be honest, if I could find my high school music teacher now, I would still try to make her sing opera in a moment of passion if she would just give me the chance. :-)

    45. GoNyGoNyGo

      Last year I honestly thought that Kyrie would flounder but I was wrong. He’s good and he’s also a good fit with KP. I have high hopes that we hit it with both Knox and Mitchel. Then, if a one or two of the other young “crap shoot” kids takes a step forward, we might have something going here.

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