Setting: The Locker Room in Madison Sq. Garden. Knicks players are in varying state of undress, some answering reporters’ questions, others are conversing amongst themselves, while Darko Milicic, completely nude, is slathering himself from head to toe with a mysterious lotion (a la Tim Hardaway – http://deadspin.com/237626/because-this-had-to-end-with-tim-hardaway-being-nude-on-youtube) that he supposedly has shipped in from the Serbian hinterlands. He claims it makes him, “More aerodynamic” for SSOL. In the corner, Nate Robinson is talking with Will Ferrell.
NATE: Yo Ricky Bobby? Why didn’t I play in the 4th? I was doing good! I don’t give you five during the game I shot at the right basket like coach told me to.
FERRELL: First of all, my name isn’t Ricky Bobby. That’s a character it’s not real.
NATE: I know that, Ricky Bobby. I did good, though. I blocked that other guy. The guy on the green team. He was going for a lay-up but I ran real fast and jumped real high and then I blocked it. Did you see that? Did you see it when I did that? Didja?
FERRELL: Yeah, I did. The problem is, when you we’re doing that pose to crowd, the Celtics got the rebound and scored anyway. And I’m not Ricky…
Nate starts posing again
NATE (screaming) Ahhhhhhhhhh!! Yeah. When I do that and block a shot. I do this Argghhhhaaaaaaza!
FERRELL: Please don’t do that.
NATE: Ok, Ron Burgundy. I do whateva you says. But the green guy was like, “Oh dip! Oh dip!” when I blocked him
FERRELL: Ron Burgundy is from another movie. And it’s still not my name. Wait, green guy? Nate, do you know who the opposing team was today?
NATE: (Laughing) Of course I do, Chazz Michael Michaels! You so crazy! You make me hella laff allatime!
FERRELL: You’re aware you lost, right?
NATE: Wha? No way. How could we lose when I hit those shots and blocked the green man and went waaaaaaaa (poses again)
FERRELL: Stop that. Stop that right now. You know the difference between fiction and reality. Stop or I will punch you so hard…I…I…(stammering)…God! I’m too filled with rage to come up with one of my trademark zany improvisations!
NATE: Why you mad, Jackie Moon?
I kid, but dollars to donuts some hack studio exec. is reading the treatment for Ferrell/Nate buddy flick where they’re, I dunno, wackily incompetent IRS auditors who by dint of luck stumble upon a huge gov’t corruption scam and save the day. Kirsten Dunst co-stars.
Tough loss. The Nix played really well in stretches and but for a unfriendly bounce on Harrington’s shot at the end of the 4th, could have won it. The real turning point though came at the start of the period, when Boston’s unholy trio were on the bench and for four consecutive trips down the floor, they failed to extend a 5 point lead. Killer. And why Eddy Curry played so much in the 4th is beyond me. Even before he whacked Rondo upside the head, he was a detriment on the court. Considering DLee was having a bounce-back game, it was inexcusable. Seriously, Coach. What were you thinking? I get benching Nate (again) after the showboating (see above) but he was having his best game of the year. Does Duhon have compromising photos of you in a skimpy policewoman outfit wielding an eggbeater and a warm squash? Please play the Douglas/Hughes backcourt more. Larry’s shown the same ability to hit Lee on the pick and roll (C-Du’s only real asset at this point) and Douglas needs pt. Same thing for not playing Gallo. I get sitting him most of the 4th b/c you don’t like him guarding Pierce (Note – I loathe Paul Pierce. I mean really hate. Maybe it’s the way he always gets the calls on his slow-mo forays into the paint but I just straight up despise that mofo), but Pierce was torching anyone else you put on him as well. Why not see if Gallinari can make Pierce work on D — something Larry Hughes & Wilson Chandler certainly weren’t doing.
W/a nasty road trip coming up, a win could’ve really been the springboard they’ve lacked. Alas, ‘twas not to be. Go west, young men.